Love, Sacred Sexuality & Ecstasy

The ancient and new way of lovemaking

By Ayana

The lover archetype

“The lover archetype, according to Jung, is the energy of sensitivity to the outer environment. It’s the psyche that is trained in sensation function. It notices colors, sounds, smells, forms and tactile sensations. The lover is thearchetype of sensuous play and display without any shame. Thus the lover is sensual, sensitive, sensually aware of and sensitive to the physical world.

The lover sees the world as if it’s in a grain of sand, it is conscious of every detail, every part reflects each other in a instant and beautiful union.

The lover is deeply sensitive and empathetic. The lover energy is also the source of spirituality, especially in mysticism. If we are appropriately accessing the lover, we feel related, connected, conscious, enthusiastic, alive, energized and romantic about life in general, our goals our work, and our achievements, the lover is the idealist and the dreamer.

The lover does need the other archetypes to stay balanced. First it needs the King archetype, to keep his chaotic energy in check and channel creativity. Without limits the energy turns destructive and chaotic. He also needs the Warrior to detach and act decisively. The lover needs the Magician to reflect and disconnect, and to see the bigger picture and gain other perspectives”.

This was an excerpt from the book:  King, Warrior, Magician, Lover by Robert Moore

Exercise: To activate the lover energy in you, practice usyour senses. Either study, an object e.g. the sky, look at the colors of the sky, the clouds, the shape of the clouds, the way they drift by etc.

When outside feel the breeze of the wind caress your skin.

Notice the smells when you walk around the farmer’s market.

Listen to the undertones in a song, you might notice tones you have never heard before.

With time and with training you’ll become more attuned to your environment.

Sex for enhancing spirituality

Sex is something that is pleasurable for most of us. Unfortunately, in this modern day and age, sex has become almost a meaningless activity. People move from one high to another, seeking constant sexual gratification, keeping score of their sexual escapades, like this is a triumph. It appears as if we have forgotten the essence, the deeper meaning of sex. Sex is awonderful, spiritual enhancing experience. It can be a wonderful way to increase spirituality in you and your partner’s life. It can open astral doorways, enhance spiritual connection. Orgasm is like a state of trance that is powerful, as it opens a deeper subconscious connection to our energetic bodies, body, mind and spirit. Absolute bliss, and ecstasy shows us a glimpse of what it is like to be the creator. Shamanic practitionersuse sex to enhance visions and they also use the healing powers of sex. When sexuality is practiced in a sacred way, it’s the ultimate way to merge the feminine and masculine forces, thus by merging duality to create something new. In addition, Oni talked about this as well, conscious sex can be used as a way to bring a child consciously into this world.


Tantra is a sexual practice that is rooted in Ancient spiritual disciplines, it combines sexuality with spirituality, sex is treated as both an energetic as well as a transcendent experience. The goal is not necessarily orgasm but rather opening the body and spirit to the Universe. The same energy can also be used for healing. The energy is generated from the genitals up through the chakra’s, all over the body till a state of total bliss, that is beyond physical pleasure, is achieved.

We need to get back to those ancient ways of sacred sexuality or rather we need to create a new sacred sexuality. Tantra offers great exercises that can bepracticed to get back to the real stuff. Combining tantric practices with your own creative ideas of sexual activity can open up and enhance your sexual experiences, your spiritual journey, and your life.

The basics: Anatomy (from the book The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka)

If you know the anatomy of your partner and you know and can learn what he/she enjoys, you can enhance the sexual interaction, be more attuned to each other needs, get in sync with each other, generate sexual energy force, enhance spirituality, and it can even be used to manifest vision.

The Female anatomy

The clitoris is described as the flying serpent. The vagina is the black hole or sacred cave. The outer labia, (vaginal lips), are the butterfly wings. The Inner labia is the sacred moth. The G-spot is the secret fire trigger.While the woman becomes aroused, the sacred moth (inner labia) and butterfly wings (outer labia) flutter, the flying serpent (clitoris) lifts its head. The sacred cave pulses and thickens in wait for the entrance of the sacred snake.

The entire vulva is an erogenous zone. Any touch anywhere around, inside or surrounding the vagina, with great finesse, the right timing and attention, can arouse a woman to a state of absolute delight.

There different types of vagina’s, which can be classified in 9 types, depending on depth and width, size of inner and outer lips, average time of orgasm etc.:

The nine types are: Sheep woman, Cat woman Buffalo woman Bear woman, Wolf woman, Antelope woman, Deer woman, Fox woman and Dancing woman

The male anatomy

The penis is called the sacred snake or Tipili and can be classified in 9 types. According to the anatomy type each man prefers a certain kind of pressure, speed, and type of movement along the shaft. The timing of the stimulation is also important to enhance sexual ecstasy.

Coming together: Sacred sexuality

Sacred sexuality is the pathway to unite both masculine and feminine energies as dual complex completing each other as One. Two halves in a dual world, coming together and experience orgasm to bond and become creators. The creator exists in a state of extremely heightened ecstasy without flaw an infinite expression.Experiencing an orgasm is powerful, as it opens a deeper subconscious connection to our energetic bodies and entire mind/body/spirit complex. Creation starts out of the sea of nothingness, in the 13 dimension, where the initial thought originates.

Lovemaking, having sex is an art. When both partners are attuned to each other’s needs and can give and receive, magic can be created. The electrical, powerful energy that is generated through sex is magical and powerful. It’s everything summed up in the intimacy, connection, touch, movement, and rhythm. Like a tasty dish, all the ingredients have to come together in the right proportions, at the right moment. They have to cook, till it all reaches a perfect boiling or cooking point, where the taste of the combined ingredients is perfect.

Lovemaking is an art that comes naturally to most lovers. If you have a deep connection with your partner or you are on the same vibe sexually, and there is enough sexual attraction, the entire sexual act will probably go effortlessly.

As time progresses, and you get to know each other better, you can enhance the sexual practice through exercises that you practice individually and together to increase your connection, spiritual practice, and use sexual energy for creation.

The elements represent qualities. Water represents movement, it flows, it’s where you give with your emotions.

Earth nourishes life, like the minerals in the earth youhold and transform energy.

Air, Wind changes direction, you receive with your minds.

Fire expands, the fire of your spirit expands and determines.

The middle is the Void, the source from everything comes and goes. 

Our sexual energy catalyzes everything in your lives. Whenever we do something we love, and we express ourselves creatively, we are expressing an aspect of our sexual-soul-force energy.

The nine orgasm types

Orgasm allows the mind to stretch beyond usual consciousness. It’s more than an energy boost, it’s an intense feeling similar to electrical current running among the spine. These energies make us feel peaceful and whole. 

There are many types of orgasms and they differ in intensity, length, and location.

Male orgasm types

North- The Hawk – Tornado

Full erection, no ejaculation, full orgasm like the wind, focus in mind and genitals till point of no return. Strong energetic bursts. It can be generated by lots of erotic talk, fantasy.

Enhanced by rythmic breaths, relax buttocks, thighs and lower belly. Having no fluid, semen come out can be a very powerful experience, it’s a great way to reduce stress.

Caution though, without proper training it can lead to kindney, bladder and prostate problems.

Men have this type of orgasm when they need to reduce stress.They let them feel completely calm and yet totally energized.

East- Eagle -Forest fire

No erection, no ejaculation, with full unexpected orgasm. Fire orgasm, heat waves rising from genitals through entire body. Lots of sweat, heat radiating through the body, electric current.

South- Owl- Avalance

Partial erection or no erection, full ejaculation, full orgasm. Water orgasm comes in slow waves, heart and emotion focused, which causes difficulty in reaching full erection. Deep sensations, intense, satifying ejaculationout of love.

West- Crow/Raven- Earthquake

Full erection,  full ejaculation, full orgasm, body sweeping chills and shudders, whole body. Leaves men feeling recharged and alive with power. It’s the usual orgasm.

Center- Thunderbird or Phoenix or the Firebird orgasm

This is the spiritual orgasm. Sends energy through the body and helps us connect on a deeper level. It can bring a couple into a deeper dimension of pleasure and give harmony. Entire body orgasm without any outward genital stimulation. These sensations can ripple through the body, and are activated by breath, muscle control and mental intention.

Female orgasm types



Starts as clitoral orgasm and comes in quick , multiple sensations that increase in bursts. The energy starts to draw inward, culmunating in a powerful, sudden implosion. Fantasy, teasing, erotic talk and erotic playulness heighten these orgasms.

Great to release tension, built-up stress.

East- Eagle- Volcano

Explosive. Primarlily clitoral, multiple climaxes, quick, intense and passionate bursts. The woman feels like she rises to the stars. 

These orgasms are the result of seduction and desire. They produce extremely passionate explosions of healing force.

West- Crow/Raven- Earthquake

Starts slowly, a rolling feeling in the womb, gradually building in strength, until it implodes with great force.  They usually come in multiple climaxes with numerous aftershocks. They can last several minutes or hours after intense lovemaking.

South- Owl- Tidal Wave


Originates in the fire trigger, g-spot and moves deep into the cave around the cervix. It moves out to produce aclitoral explosion. It is accompanied by deep emotions.

Center- Fire breath orgasm (same for men and women)

Entire body orgasm without any outward genital stimulation. These sensations can ripple through the body, and are activated by breath, muscle control and mental intention.

Sexual healing practices

Sacred/Sexual space

Create a beautiful space, you can use candles, drapes, burn incense, put on music. Create a love altar, where you place the elements of earth, water, wind and fire together. You can create your sacred space ritual, or ceremony around sex or masturbation. Set an intention for transformation. Ask yourself what moves you or is sacred or special to you. Consider your intention, what do you want to create, heal, or bless in ritual? It’s an opportunity to bring hearts, bodies, minds and spirits into alignment. Co-creatign an inten before, during and after lovemaking brings meaning and passion to the lovemaking.

After you set your intention call in any teachers, Gods, Goddesses, to bless and assist during your union.

These three keys can be used simultaneously to increase the body’s capacity to maintain and expand excitement in the body

Exercise 1 : Releasing pent-up energy and charging up1) Deep breathing2) Movement- use dance, exercise, and full expression of emotions3) Sound- sigh, shout, cry, scream. Don’t bottle up your emotions.


Dancing can be a very sensual activity. It’s a wonderful foreplay activity, and if you don’t want to have sex yet, dance together instead. Preferably pick songs with a strong beat, if you have access to African drummingmusic or shamanic drumming even better. Kizomba, the modern lambada, is another sensual music with a strong beat. Drum music when combined with dancing opens the frequency codes stored in the African body, and it causes these codes to interface with the environment. Drumming music can also be used to store information in the energetic body. Like a computer drumming can be used to program the physical and energetic body. Just follow the beat and move together. If you can synchronize your movements completely to each other and the beat, it generates a powerful electrical current, which can be used to manifest creation, through visualization or intention setting.

Exercise 2Chakra merging

A way to connect the female and male chakra toenergize the chakras and create oneness and a deep connection. It’s a great way to enhance intimacy before love making. It’s also a great way to connect if you don’t want to have sexual intercourse yet. The description is from the book The sexual Practices of Quodoshka, Teachings from the Nagual tradition. As well as the anatomy and orgasm types above.These are all described elaborately in the book.

Exercise 3: Advanced tantric exercise from the book The Art of sexual ecstasy

Shooting the crown together

Shooting the Crown instructions

Make sure you have brushed your teeth and don’t do this exercise after eating, smoking or if you’re sick.

Relax, sit or lie in a chill position, continue with the penetration.

The partner who goes on top, sit/lies with mouth next to partner’s ear

Synchronize your breathing, inhaling and exhaling together

Invert the pattern, one partner inhales, while the other exhales

The inverted breathing should be deep and slow

Take 5-10 min till your breathing is synchronized

Switch to mouth-to-mouth breathing

Start kissing, move to French kiss

Then keep the lips together, barely touching

Feel the breath going in and out

Feel the breath of your partner go all the way to your sex center

Imagine that your exchanging energy, light, colors, sounds, rhythms. The man imagines his penis giving energy into the woman’s vagina. When the woman inhales she should inhale this energy taking it into her vagina, mixing it with her energy. Pulling it up through to her third eye and crown.

Exhaling the woman brings the energy back down to her vagina, giving it back to her partner. The man then inhaling, sucks this energy and draws it up all the way to his crown.

The man can enjoy stimulation, he can rock, and pump, but remain below point of no return, avoid ejaculation.

Repeat the loop of breath through the center and crown.

Imagine the breath touching the genitals. This visualization will enhance the erotic sensations of pleasure.

Focus your energy on the third eye chakra or crown chakra. Pull the energy up and feel a golden light spiraling up. Let it shoot out of your crown to the Universe.

Then let the energy flow back down through your crown, while exhaling.

For more information and exercises:

The Art of Sexual Ecstasy by Margo Anand

The Sexual practices of Quodoushka, Teachings from the nagual tradition by Amara Charles

King, Warrior, Magician, Lover by Magician Moore

Carnal Apple, Woman filled, Burning moon

Poem by Pablo Neruda

Carnal apple, Woman filled, burning moon,
dark smell of seaweed, crush of mud and light,
what secret knowledge is clasped between your pillars?
What primal night does Man touch with his senses?
Ay, Love is a journey through waters and stars,
through suffocating air, sharp tempests of grain:
Love is a war of lightning,
and two bodies ruined by a single sweetness.
Kiss by kiss I cover your tiny infinity,
your margins, your rivers, your diminutive villages,
and a genital fire, transformed by delight,
slips through the narrow channels of blood
to precipitate a nocturnal carnation,
to be, and be nothing but light in the dark

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